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#13 - Important Things Never to Say to Someone Who has Experienced a Loss

10/4/2014

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"You should be over this by now."

By Bob Rill, B.S., Chaplain
Grief Recovery Specialist

www.TheGriefandWellnessGroup.com

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“You should be over this by now.” The instructions on the package say, “Cover the dish and microwave for four minutes.  Stir, recover and microwave for another four minutes before serving.”  Isn’t microwave technology wonderful?

Since grief from a loss doesn’t come with a label and instructions on how to get over it, those who are observing the pain the grieving person is experiencing want to give the griever a quick fix to their problem.  While the truth is that the griever can, in fact, get over the loss that he or she has experienced, it will take longer than 10 minutes.

There are many people who have suffered with a loss for over 10, 20 or 30 years before they finally felt they were able to get over it.  So, what’s the answer?

While every individual’s journey is unique, there is a way to move beyond the loss.  The fact is every loss carries with it the seed of a growing opportunity.  Yet, anything that moves the griever out of his or her comfort zone and forces them to grow like a loss does, must have a prescribed path to follow in order to take them to a successful conclusion.

Since there is 100% likelihood that everyone will experience several difficult losses in their lifetime, we’d better know the prescribed path to take to preserve our health and well-being.

My hope is that you will direct those you think should be over their loss by now to The Grief and Wellness Group and give us the opportunity to point the griever in the right direction as we walk that journey with them. 

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Bob Rill, B.S., Chaplain
Grief Recovery Specialist

Bob has 18 years of experience as an educator and administrator. As a Grief Recovery Specialist and Veteran, he delights in helping individuals move beyond the pain of loss.

Bob is available to walk you through the actual steps to recovery.  Call 520-668-5906 and ask for Bob.

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