When you read the title of this article I imagine you crinkled nose and brow. I’m not surprised, that is what my wife did when I offered her some delicious kosher pickles the other morning.
I’m going to tell you right up front the point of this article. You and I are influenced and conditioned to believe that many things, in this case breakfast should be wrapped in a certain, tidy package. It should be done during a certain time frame, relegated to a certain type of food, and most of all defined to a certain social context.
Actually, for most of us that works very well. It is a tight social code that fits comfortably into our lives. It helps you communicate with those around you and brings order and familiarity to your daily existence.
We are lead to believe that Kellogg’s Corn Flakes (yea, Tony the Tiger), eggs, bacon and hash browns; cinnamon rolls along with so many delicious treats like pancakes, and French toast are the acceptable choices.
McDonalds wants you to believe that breakfast is best when done between 6:30 and 10:30 AM and that lunch should start no later than 10:31 AM. Denney’s on the other hand thinks it’s perfectly okay to eat breakfast at any time of the day.
Well, the other morning I jumped out of bed at 4 AM and, as usual ,coffee was the first thing on my menu. It fits right into the social norms so far, right? The next thing I realized is it was 8AM and I haven’t had anything to eat for breakfast. I had created a healthy appetite by that time. Hungry and in a hurry, I decided to make a grilled cheese sandwich with mayo and Kosher Pickles; and washed down with carbonated water. Since my wife thinks I’m some sort of sandwich genius, I offered her a bite. That’s when I got “the look.” No pickles for breakfast for her.
Grief has many social codes that can hinder our lives. When you or I experience a loss, whether it is being laid off work, a divorce, or a devastating automotive accident, we are told, “You’ve got to just get over it,” “ Pick yourself up and keep going,” or my favorite “You can’t let it get you down.”
Such sage advice gives us the courage and the tools to just get over it, right? Rubbish! You still feel the knot in your stomach any time you think the loss you’ve experienced. Your mind continues to play the details that surrounds the circumstances over and over. Your self-talk plays the recording, “If I’d only…” or “I wish I would have or could have done something different, better, or more.”
Well there is good news. There is a method that will guide you through the minefield of guilt and negative thoughts to a helpful and meaningful conclusion. The method is known as the Grief Recovery Method. It is designed walk you through a journey to discover the truth about your LOSS. The process will take you through the good times and the difficult times and bring you out into the other side where you can see daylight once again.
You owe it to yourself to realize the truth about the things that have been a burden to you. With little work and a lot of honesty mixed into the process, you will be able to take the steps that will give you the freedom you desire.
Frankly, what and when you eat breakfast may help you to become physically a champion, thank you Wheaties. Otherwise, it is not going to make a huge impact on your overall life. How you choose to “get over it” will restore strength, health, and the joy you desire for your life. This process is available to you, but the first step is up to you.
If you are tired of living in the doldrums and sadness you are now experiencing take that first step to recovery. I will be there with you every step of this journey. Let me know when you want to get started. Give me a call at the Grief and Wellness Group.
Grief Recovery Specialist
Bob has 18 years of experience as an educator and administrator. As a Grief Recovery Specialist and Veteran, he delights in helping individuals move beyond the pain of loss.