There is no shortage of hurting people in our community. Most of us will encounter a significant loss every seven to nine years. Also, one in three people you encounter whether at work, church or at home is dealing with a loss of some sort. So, if you and your household are doing well, chances are one of your co-workers or neighbors is facing one of the over 40 losses that can disrupt our lives.
Let me tell you the impact the Grief Recovery Program has had on my life. My dad was a pastor. We made two major moves in my life – both before the age of 14. This may be the first time you have realized that a move can be a major loss. The first move happened when I was very young. I don’t remember much about it, so the impact was low. But, the second move from Oklahoma to St. Louis, Missouri included a number of huge losses.
1. Loss of familiar surroundings
2. Loss of friends and schoolmates
3. Loss of my first hunting dog
4. Loss of my go-cart
5. Loss of the bike I got for Christmas.
Why? The bike had bent rims and my dad didn’t know what to do to get them fixed so he threw it away. This one move and the way it was handled, set me up for a very, very rocky relationship with my dad – especially during my teen years – and even beyond.
Now, let me make just one comment about the healing that took place as a result of my grief recovery in that relationship.
My first hunting dog was a German Short Hair Pointer – just coming into his own pointing and obeying commands. I couldn’t take the dog to St. Louis because, according to my dad, “It would dig up the yard. But, we’ll get you a new dog, which they did.
The rest of the story, as Paul Harvey used to say: the new dog was a miniature French Poodle, and get this, named Shu Shu. My 70 pound hunting dog named Duke was replaced by a three pound French Poodle named Shu Shu and I found great humor for the first time in my life in recognizing the irony of the whole thing.
Holding onto the past hurts of those significant losses had no effect on my deceased dad but they haunted me until I was finally able to complete and resolve my relationship with him.
Our mission at The Grief & Wellness Group is to help hurting people in the Tucson area be able to move beyond the pain caused by the losses they encounter.If you or someone you know is experiencing loss, give us a call today.
Grief Recovery Specialist
Bob has 18 years of experience as an educator and administrator. As a Grief Recovery Specialist and Veteran, he delights in helping individuals move beyond the pain of loss.